


To Endure Whatever Comes

by Maeve_of_Winter



Category: The Trixie Belden Mysteries - Julie Campbell Tatham & Kathryn Kenny
Genre: M/M, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-15
Updated: 2016-05-06
Packaged: 2018-05-20 16:21:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6016255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maeve_of_Winter/pseuds/Maeve_of_Winter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In their sophomore year of high school, Mart hunts for the perfect Valentine's Day gift to give to Dan.</p><p>Written for <a href="http://jixemitri.net/circle/projects/2cwp4.html">Jixemitri Valentine CWP.</a></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story is an expansion on the circumstances detailed in my "Unexpected" ficlet.
> 
> Constructive criticism and feedback are always welcome. My email is goldphoenixrising@yahoo.com.
> 
> A big thank you to my editor/beta writer, Julie W., for helping with this story. :)

Many Sleepyside residents were initially opposed to the addition of a two-to-four-story mall to the central area of town. Arguments against it cited the accompanying creation of chaos and traffic hazards, and ruination of the bucolic charm of the town and landscape.

Dan had not been one of them. “I really don’t give a damn about who’s building what where unless it infringes upon someone else’s personal liberties,” he’d said. “Besides, the sooner a smoothie shop gets to this place, the better.”

The need for commerce and jobs eventually won out, and the mall was quickly constructed. Once finished, it boasted of forty-eight shops and restaurants in the primary two stories, with one four-story department store at the north end, and another at the south.

Now, fifteen-year-old Mart Belden restlessly paced down the corridor, passing numerous shops on either side. Fifty businesses in the place, not counting the center kiosks or food court, and he still had no idea what sort of Valentine’s Day present to give to Dan.

Wandering into the bookstore, Mart glanced around for gift ideas. One Valentine’s Day display featured trite titles such as _Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus._ Another held a cluster of Laurell K. Hamilton books. Mart snorted. No thanks.

Wandering further into the store, Mart paused at the comic book aisle, where he normally could have spent hours. A comic trade was too obvious of a gift; they talked about comics all the time (Dan’s favorite characters were Thor and Loki).

Moving to another holiday display, Mart scrutinized a text on the St. Valentine’s Day Massacre. Dan was raised Catholic, after all, and those people loved hearing about their saints. But no, a book was too impersonal.

A pair of college-aged women ambled by Mart, one of them relating a tale to another. “--and when she finally showed up, she had her boyfriend in tow! They were doing that oversexed couple thing all throughout the movie, and I felt like a total third wheel, even though I was the one who made plans--”

A movie, maybe? But Mr. Maypenny didn’t keep a TV in his cabin, and besides, Mart had already shared the Belden family Netflix subscription with Dan on his laptop. A movie would be redundant.

Continuing to scan the store, hope briefly surged through Mart when he spotted the collectibles section. They both enjoyed _Dr. Who_ , so maybe some franchise merchandise? No, Dan already owned a Weeping Angel T-shirt (in black, of course), and really, what other _Dr. Who_ merchandise did a person need? Besides, Dan didn’t believe in possessions for the sake of possessions, therefore eliminating any type of pop culture novelty gift. Dan would prefer something he would use regularly.

Clothes? That would be simple, as Dan’s color of choice was black, sometimes with dark blue, gray, red, or green. Very occasionally, he wore another brighter color, but that was usually when he didn’t have the heart or time to dye it black. Yet, clothing seemed too direct when they’d only been dating, and unofficially, at that, for a month.

During a quiet moment alone together at Christmas, Dan had grabbed him and kissed him under the mistletoe.

“You want this?” Mart had asked, surprised. He’d signalled his interest to Dan on several previous occasions, and while Dan reciprocated each time, he’d also always shied away from the idea of a relationship, per usual when anyone expressed a romantic interest in him outside of sex. He’d since assumed Dan preferred one night stands to any actual continued companionship. Love ‘em and leave ‘em, that was Dan, dating no one but warming the bed of anyone who so much as glanced in his direction. Until that someone wanted commitment from him. That’s when Dan took his leave without so much of a backwards glance.

“Yeah.” Dan had smiled then, not the artificial one he wore for the sake of politeness, not the sarcastic one he used for authority figures, but a genuine smile that softened his face and lent him radiant appeal. “I think it’s about time, don’t you?”

Since then, they’d been together without actually naming their relationship. Dan had stopped falling into bed with any girl or adult woman who invited him, and Mart had put a little bit of distance between Diana and himself, just enough to indicate he was now dating someone else. He wanted to make this relationship work, and if Dan, the ultimate cynic and skeptic, was willing to give it a try, Mart thought the two of them could be more than happy together.

While Mart knew Dan was not a person to judge a gift in itself, and rather would simply be grateful for the thought, he wanted to give Dan a present that proved they were good for each other, proved Mart knew him and cared for him deeply. The only problem was that Mart couldn’t determine any gift Dan might actually want.

With a sigh, Mart exited the bookstore, just in time to hear yet _another_ saccharine jewelry commercial gushing over the sentimental significance of diamond rings for Valentine’s Day. As he walked, he saw nothing but ads and store windows hawking their Valentine-themed wares; his mood did briefly lift, though, at the sight of a poster for Victoria’s Secret, depicting scantily clad women with oil-rubbed bodies posing sexily and gazing confidently at the camera.

But the tagline-- _Get your sweetheart something sexy this Valentine’s Day_ \-- brought a scowl to his face. It was as though all of the advertisements were mocking him and his utter cluelessness.

Well, if current commercialism didn’t give Mart any good ideas, maybe past celebrations would.

 

* * *

 

After dinner that evening, Mart took his turn clearing the table and washing the dishes. As he did, Bobby claimed the kitchen table to make his mailbox for the Valentine’s Day exchange at the elementary school. Their mother joined Bobby, presumably to ascertain he didn’t eat the paste.

Once he was finished with his chores, Mart perused the book shelves of the family room until he found the object of his search: his parents’ wedding album. Hopefully, seeing the wedding presents they received would inspire a deep, meaningful gift he could give to Dan.

Unfortunately for him, there was no list or pictures of wedding gifts. Luckily, Mart had not one, but two other sources to consult on the matter.

A certain page of the album did catch his attention, though. The page contained nothing but a three-inch by three-inch square of nylon, with a large, gaping gash across the fabric. The jagged edges of the tear were lined with some sort of glue to prevent fraying.

Curious, Mart lugged the album into the kitchen, where his mother was just preventing Bobby from upending the entire container of glitter onto the cardboard shoebox, which was now wrapped in red paper.

“What’s the story with this?” He asked his mother, indicating the damaged piece of fabric.

His mother looked at the page and smiled. “Oh, Lord, that’s from before your father and I were married. We met as freshmen in college, and we didn’t date until years later. One night, I had just finished studying and was going to meet my boyfriend-- not your father at that time-- for dinner. But my heel caught on the sidewalk, and I stumbled and fell. There were plenty of people nearby, and I was very embarrassed. Not to mention my stockings were ruined, and with my apartment all the way across campus, I would be late if I went back to change.”

“What happened?” Bobby questioned while placing stickers haphazardly on the box’s outer lid.

“Your father happened to be close by,” Mrs. Belden told them. “He helped me up, and when I mentioned I was going to be late to meet my boyfriend, he immediately volunteered to drive me.” She chuckled. “He must have been going twice the speed limit when he drove me back to my apartment, and three times when he took me to the restaurant later. But it meant a lot to me that he was willing to help me out.”

“So, this is a piece of your old stockings, then?” Mystery solved, Mart closed the album, preparing to replace it on the shelf.

“A few weeks later, my boyfriend proposed to me, but I wasn’t ready to settle down,” Mrs. Belden explained. “We separated amicably, and the next time I saw your father, I asked him to coffee. I remembered how kind he had been to me, even though we weren’t dating and weren't very familiar with each other. Remember that, gentlemen.” She looked meaningfully at Mart and Bobby. “If you want to truly impress someone, you don’t do it through machismo, ego, money, jealousy, or antagonism. You don’t do it by treating that person as less than you. The true way to the heart is generosity and kindness.”

“Why didn’t you sew the stockings back?” Bobby asked, crookedly taping a ribbon along the edge of the box. “You always sew my shirts back.”

“I always intended to repair those stockings, but busy as college is, by the time I got around to it, my roommate’s cat had shredded them beyond repair,” Mrs. Belden admitted. “Ironically, the only section that rascal left intact was the part I’d already ripped, and by then, since I was dating your father, I decided to keep them and see where it went. And as it turned out, I had an interesting keepsake to show off during my wedding speech.”

“Speaking of weddings,” Mart inquired hopefully, “what was your favorite wedding gift?”

“Our washer and dryer,” Mrs. Belden said promptly. “We still have them today. Back when your grandparents lived here, they had their laundry sent out, but it’s much more convenient to simply wash clothes at home.”

“Er, any favorites that weren’t major appliances?” Mart pressed.

“Hmm.” Mrs. Belden thought for a moment. “Thinking about it, your uncle Harold gave us a very nice gift basket. It had all kinds of treats-- jams, wines, artisan crackers, pastries-- all those extras that are fun to have but you don’t want to spend the excess money yourself. It wasn’t an actual wedding gift, but a housewarming present we received after the honeymoon.”

A gift basket. Well, it wasn’t like Mart had any better ideas. “Thanks, Moms,” he said. “That’s an interesting story, too, about how you decided to date Dad.”

“You’re welcome, dear,” Mrs. Belden replied serenely, as she pulled a jar of sequins away from the edge of the table just before Bobby’s elbow could knock it down.


	2. Chapter 2

The night before Valentine’s Day, Mart proudly surveyed the components of the gift he had assembled for Dan.  It included several package of tea and coffee--because Dan had a fondness for hot drinks-- incense--because Dan literally burned through the stuff and used it for spiritual practices (which Mart speculated likely had something to do with his Celtic background)--and an original poem, just to ensure Dan knew what he meant to Mart.

And while Dan normally wasn’t a fan of sweets, he couldn’t resist any combination of peanut butter and chocolate, so Mart attempted a new recipe: chocolate peanut butter graham cracker bars. Taste tests conducted by the Belden family (except for Reddy, who whined at each of them to share and then sulked when no scraps were forthcoming) concluded the recipe was a success. 

Despite Dan’s lack of sweet tooth, Mart also included a box of chocolates, because it was Valentine’s Day, after all. Following extended consideration and another consultation of his parents’ wedding album, he dressed up the standard packaging somewhat by appropriating Bobby’s craft supplies and using the ribbon to give the box a bow.

Once he ascertained all aspects of the gift were collected, Mart retrieved the rucksack he had bought for Dan at the sporting goods store. He had conned Trixie into letting him borrow some money, with the stipulation that he would pay it back by watching Bobby for her. In that agreement, Mart won because 1) Trixie often neglected to watch Bobby anyway, yet still collected her allowance, 2) at times, Mart got stuck watching Bobby regardless, due to Trixie’s absence. Nothing really changed for Trixie with Mart’s promise to watch Bobby, but Mart managed to emerge from the promise with funds.

Just as Mart was carefully placing each item in the rucksack, his father returned to the kitchen, placing the cordless phone back into its cradle.

“Hey, Dad,” Mart greeted him. “How are Uncle Harold and the rest of the Idaho Beldens?”

“Oh, they’re fine,” Mr. Belden replied. “They’re having a wonderful time in Austria.” For a moment, he simply watched Mart’s activities. “Will you be home for dinner tomorrow, or will you be off celebrating Valentine’s with Dan?”

Startled, Mart turned to look at his father. “How did you know about Dan and I? We’ve never told anyone.”

“I didn’t actually know,” Mr. Belden said dryly. “My next guess would have been Diana.” 

Mart paused, frowning briefly at the little effort necessary to determine his actions. “Wow. I didn’t realize I was that transparent.” 

“Well, they’re probably the two friends you spend the most time with, and I’ve never heard you discuss any other schoolmates with as much detail as the two of them.” Mr. Belden thought for a moment. “Unless Jane Morgan--”

“No,” Mart said immediately. Jane Morgan, while beautiful and intelligent, was much too conniving for Mart to ever be comfortable with her. “Dan and Jane used to have a thing for each other, but that’s over, now.”

“Yes, about Dan.” Mr. Belden let the name hang in the air for a moment before continuing. “I think he’s a fine young man, Mart. God knows he’s done more than I could ever ask to preserve this family and be strong for your younger brother and sister. But I’m worried that . . . well, to be frank, it’s obvious to anyone that Dan’s no stranger to hardship.”

“Because he’s been in foster care, you mean?” Mart couldn’t help but muse over Dan’s idiosyncrasies: intent wariness, tight control over expressing emotion, chronic insomnia, disdain for authority figures, and aversion to touch. It was obvious that such traits developed over an extended period of turmoil.

Mr. Belden let out a long breath. “Dan doesn’t come from the same background you do, Mart. He’s different.”

“Well, yes,” Mart responded quizzically. “But aren’t all people, fundamentally?”

“I mean beyond what’s expected,” Mr. Belden clarified. “There have been many people in Dan’s life who were supposed to protect him and take care of him, but let him down again and again. Combine that with what went on last August, and it’s perfectly understandable he wouldn’t be in a position to trust easily.”

Mart knew his father was referring to the two weeks over the summer that a group of criminals held Dan captive at the Glen Road Inn. No one had ever really discussed it since it happened, least of all Dan himself. Mart had tried to convince Dan to talk about it with him, but Dan resignedly refused. After the incident, Dan’s aversion to touch had only increased, and a new habit of wearing long sleeves, no matter what the temperature, appeared.

“You don’t think it’s a good idea for Dan and me to be together,” Mart stated quietly.

Sighing, Mr. Belden reached over and placed a hand on Mart’s shoulder. “I wholeheartedly approve of Dan, but I think you should consider that he might not be ready to date you or anyone else. Dan’s certainly had a trying time of it for the past few years, and suffering in isolation takes its toll on a person.”

“But he doesn’t have to be alone anymore,” Mart pointed out. “He has me-- as a friend, or if he wants, a significant other.”

“For now, he might need you as a friend more than anything else,” Mr. Belden told him gently. “I’m not objecting to the two of you dating, but you have to be aware that Dan might not be prepared to have a close relationship with you at the moment.”

“Have you . . . is it your impression that he won’t be?” Mart asked his father, his stomach twisting in anticipation of the answer.

Mr. Belden hesitated, and then appeared to be choosing his words very carefully. “It’s my impression that Dan is very wounded, and healing takes time. It’s not a switch you can suddenly flip on and spontaneously be recovered. Healing is a process, and in many ways, a battle. If Dan does end up pushing you away-- and I’m not saying he definitely will-- it means that right now, above all things he needs a friend. You need to be patient and understand that. Understand that it’s not your fault or his for your plans going off track. He’s not deliberately holding out on you or condemning you-- he just needs time to recover.”

Though dismayed by his father’s opinion, Mart could not deny the truth to it. Dan was a very cautious, guarded person, and, due to what Mart presumed was a fear of rejection, had a habit of pushing people away rather than confiding in them.

“Thanks, Dad,” Mart replied seriously. “I’ll be patient with Dan. He’s very important to me.”

Mr. Belden smiled. “When all’s said and done, Mart, if you and Dan do decide to go forward, I fully expect you to do the gentlemanly thing and have him over for a family dinner.” 

Mart chuckled. “Will do, Dad.”

Later that night, Mart lay awake in bed, contemplating his father’s words. Dan had initiated the romance between them, and taking that first step had to indicate he was ready. Didn’t it? Or had Mart given the impression somewhere along the line that he was impatient with Dan’s reluctance and tired of their platonic relationship, and only a romance would alleviate his frustration?

Maybe it was time he talked to Dan and actually defined their relationship, determined what each of them wanted and expected. Mart already knew what he wanted: to make Dan happy, and for Dan to remain happy.

But he had no desire to confine Dan into a relationship which the latter found uncomfortable. He wanted to be with Dan, but he didn’t want Dan to be with him only for the sake of preserving their friendship, or otherwise out of obligation.

They would talk tomorrow. Valentine’s Day was about love, after all, and love was about more than just a hallmark card.


	3. Chapter 3

Throughout his entire routine the next morning, Mart mentally strategized on methods of engaging Dan. Ultimately, the only logical conclusion was to meet him at his locker. They no longer had homeroom together, as they had when they were freshmen, and Dan habitually joined Jim to drive into school early rather than taking the bus. 

At the beginning of the school year, Dan had found his class schedule consisted of an inexplicable mix of sophomore and senior level classes, mistakenly created and approved by the guidance department. When Dan brought the error to the administration, the necessary authorities had refused to correct the blatant oversight. Due to such circumstances, the only chance Mart had during the school day to interact with Dan was at locker breaks.

Gathering his materials for his morning classes, Mart prepared to close his locker and leave, but Diana joined him just as he was about to depart.

“Happy Valentine’s Day!” She greeted him with a winning smile. Despite the early morning hour, Diana was resplendent in a red and white lacy dress, which, Mart couldn’t help but notice, emphasized her curves and long legs quite nicely. 

“You, too,” Mart said, returning her smile. 

One hand fiddling with the rose decoration she wore in her glossy black hair, Diana produced a silk-wrapped box of professionally hand-crafted chocolates. “I got these chocolates for you,” she told him, as though confessing a scandalous secret. “I know you’re with someone else now, and that we weren’t ever actually dating in the first place, but I still want to be friends.”

“I want to be friends, too,” Mart said, withdrawing his own gift for Diana and offering it to her. “I’m sorry about the way I treated you. I abruptly cut you off once I decided to date someone else, and that wasn’t fair to you, even if we weren’t really together.”

“It’s all right, Mart,” Diana reassured him. “If you didn’t want to be with me to begin with, forcing a relationship would be pointless. If you weren’t committed and I knew it, we would just wind up making each other miserable.” 

Mart was surprised that such wisdom could be expressed by a mere high school freshmen. “Thank you, Diana.”

Giving him another smile, Diana opened the box. “Oh, they’re beautiful!” She gasped.

“I emailed Dot and asked her for advice,” Mart explained. Dot Murray was a friend of the BWGs who lived in Iowa. Deciding he’d rather not relay the situation to any family member, Mart had asked Dot for help on choosing a gift for a “purely platonic female friend.”

Diana lifted one of the chandelier earrings out of the box, letting the glass teardrop beads glimmer in the sunlight. “They’re lovely. Thank you, Mart. I hope you have a happy Valentine’s Day with your sweetheart, whoever that person is.” She leaned in and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek, ignoring the wolf whistles of passing students.

After exchanging goodbyes with Diana, Mart went off to the second story in search of Dan, eventually spotting him standing at his locker further down the hall of the science wing. For a moment, Mart simply stood, watching Dan.

God, had it really been a year since he and Dan had met? It didn’t seem possible, but it was true, almost an exact year to the day.

When Mart had first laid eyes Dan, he thought Dan looked like a character from a movie, both because of his delinquent attire and his ridiculous handsomeness-- Dan was very good-looking, but not in a traditional way. Jim had referred to Dan as a “pretty boy” since the latter’s first day at school, and it was an apt description. There were more than a few hints of androgyny about Dan’s features, like his full, dark eyelashes that surrounded his icy blue eyes. Suffice to say, with his sleek black hair, alabaster skin, wiry frame, and brooding nature, Dan was the classic embodiment of the tortured Byronic hero that brought women to swoon.

On the day they’d met, no love was lost between them. Dan had been aloof at best, vitriolic at worst, and generally unimpressed with everyone and everything around him. Mart’s day had been occupied with trying to keep his temper in check, as Dan's attitude rendered any display of niceties into an arduous, grueling task. He was stubborn, contrary, sullen, and prideful to the point Mart was sorely tempted to punch him in the jaw less than ten minutes following their introduction. 

And at the same time, Dan had a strong, noble but wounded quality about him, which brought Mart to theorize that Dan was fully aware of his unpleasant attitude. His spiteful demeanor was a facade, a shield to ward off any unwanted attention, to prevent anyone from hurting him again, intentionally or not.

Which was why, schizophrenic as it might seem, Mart had found himself telling Trixie to leave Dan alone shortly after verbalizing his desire to give Dan a swift uppercut to the face.

It was just as well he didn't hit Dan. Even then, Mart had suspected the kid would tear him to pieces without pausing to blink. Subsequent events he later witnessed would prove this impression correct.

Diana initially had been somewhat infatuated by Dan, Mart knew, but he could hardly blame her. He was fascinated by Dan, as well, though he was aware of the self-serving implications accompanying the phrase. It sounded as if he thought of Dan more as a passing curiosity than a person, but honestly, he was careful never to treat Dan in such a manner. About a third of the other students of Sleepyside High to this day regarded Dan a constant source of gossip fodder, another third just found him another attractive form to admire, and the remaining third didn’t know or care about him whatsoever.

In the time between Dan rescuing Bobby and the opening of the ice carnival, Mart had found himself musing on Dan and their initial encounter. During his retrospective, he wondered what Dan’s opinion had been regarding him as an individual. Numerous possibilities occurred to Mart, snob, yahoo, narc, and sycophant among them. Then it had dawned on Mart that no matter what pejorative Dan bestowed upon him at their first meeting, he wouldn't have realized the significance of Mart being one of the Belden family. 

Small town life might sound idyllic, but one particular aspect was a source of endless frustration and annoyance for Mart: he was known primarily by his family. Adults based on their judgements of him off his parents; his peers made assumptions about him based on his siblings.

Mart was forever the middle child. He not only shared the traditional position with Trixie, but he also was the middle of the three Belden Boys and the middle of the three elder Belden children. What made this situation bearable at first was that Trixie, the other middle child and his "almost twin," shared this fate and lack of identity. But the situation changed during the summer before Mart’s freshman year of high school. He and Brian went off to work as counselors at a summer camp, while Trixie remained behind at the farm. But then a millionaire moved in next door, and a runaway hid out at Ten Acres, and before Mart knew it, Trixie wasn't just another Belden-- she was  _ the _ Belden.

He entered high school proud to be on the side of the building designated for the senior high students, having graduated from the section for the junior high. He celebrated a little too soon, because everyone in the senior high knew him as Brian's kid brother, and then everyone in the junior high knew him as Trixie's older brother. The students in his own grade were friendly, but he was fully aware they likely thought of and identified him as a Belden without recalling he had his own distinct personality.

But Dan knew him solely as Mart, first and foremost, not as Brian’s or Trixie's brother, not as Helen and Peter's son. Forget his parents and siblings; Mart was the first Belden to speak to Dan, the first one to make a full impression. Granted, Trixie's snickering and pointing of fingers likely had some impact as well. But Dan would probably consider Trixie in association with Mart rather than the other way around. For once in his life, Mart had stepped out of the shadows of his siblings and met someone without familial preconceptions looming over their introduction. 

Dan’s arrival had done something for Mart that no other resident of Sleepyside could: he gave Mart an identity. He restored Mart’s sense of self. And knowing what Dan had done for him, Mart had designated a goal of uncovering Dan’s true personality. He would reinstate Dan’s identity, as Dan had for him.

The process had been gradual. Dan’s conspicuous absence from several of their club trips hadn’t exactly been conducive to beginning a friendship. But Dan had finally relaxed his defenses when the two of them discovered they shared a love of fantasy and science fiction books. The pair had only grown closer from that day forward, with Mart using book discussions as a method of drawing out Dan’s opinions, encouraging Dan to become invested and interested in their conversations, and showing Dan it was safe to put forth his true self.  

Out of all bases,  _ Star Trek _ novels were an unlikely cornerstone for their friendship. But such was the motto of  _ Star Trek _ :  “To boldly go where no man has gone before.” 

The jangling of the warning bell startled Mart from his navel-gazing, and remembering his task, he started forth. However, the very next moment, Jane Morgan materialized beside Dan. 

Per usual, she was impeccably dressed in some vintage-inspired outfit that was no doubt designer. With her gleaming long blonde curls and well-proportioned figure, Mart had little choice but to grudgingly concede Jane was a stunning sight to behold. And of course, Mart couldn’t blame Dan for giving her a rare, brilliant smile and appearing genuinely happy to see her.

Still, a pang of jealousy struck Mart as Jane handed Dan a heart-shaped box and he gave her one in return. He knew he wasn’t being fair, wasn’t being reasonable-- he had no call for envy after his own gift exchange with Diana. Yet when Jane, seemingly in a rush, traded a few quick words with Dan, embraced him briefly, and then dashed off, Mart couldn’t but breathe a guilty sigh of relief.

Moving forward, Mart joined Dan at his locker. “A gift from one of your many admirers?” He teased Dan, casually nodding at the gift from Jane. 

“Just from a friend,” Dan said, with a smile that made Mart feel like he was basking in the warm rays of the sun. God, that smile. 

Opening the box, he offered the contents to Mart. “Want some?”

Strawberries. Dan’s favorite fruit. Strawberries Jane took the time to cut into heart shapes, no less. An undeniable sense of annoyance prickled Mart’s skin.

“Sure,” Mart said, accepting the proffered refreshment, not wanting to hint that something was amiss. “She’s very beautiful, you know. Jane,” he added, trying his best to appear nonchalant.

“She is,” Dan agreed, stowing a stack of Kurt Vonnegut library books in his locker. “I’m glad she and I stayed friends, even if things didn’t work out between us romantically.”

“Speaking of romance,” Mart began. “I have a Valentine’s gift for you. We should meet later, so I can give it to you.”

“What a coincidence,” Dan drawled. “As it so happens, I bought you a gift as well.” He turned from facing his locker to look directly at Mart, and the pair smiled as their eyes met.

“Come over and hang out with me at the cabin tonight,” Dan invited him. “I’m the only one home for the next couple of days, so it will be just us.”

“I’ll be there,” Mart promised, grinning. Roaming the Wheeler game preserve and surrounding areas with Dan was one of his favorite pastimes.

Dan’s glacier blue eyes glinted, a sharp contrast against his thick coal black eyelashes and winter pale skin. “I look forward to it.”

Mart nodded. “I’ll see you then,” he said with a wave goodbye, anticipation bubbling within him. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan and Mart have a heart-to-heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While Dan’s background is extremely vague and contains numerous discrepancies, some of which can be found even in his introductory book, Mr. Maypenny does tell Trixie that Dan’s father died (in Korea), leaving Dan’s mother to raise him alone. 
> 
> Given that my stories take place in a modern universe where Dan’s father would have not yet been been born at the time of the Korean War, I have changed this aspect of Dan’s past. Here, I’ve reversed the order of his parents’ deaths: Dan’s mother dies when Dan’s father is overseas, Dan gets sent to foster care, and not too long afterward, receives notification that his father has died. Considering the Korea part is automatically removed from my stories by virtue of the updated setting, I don’t think my revision is all that groundbreaking, but I thought it might be helpful to clarify my intent and reasons.

The night air was cool and crisp but not especially cold when Mart set out on horseback to the Maypenny cabin that evening. Clad in a full winter ensemble of a jack with a scarf, hat, and gloves, Mart paused several times to unwind, and later remove his scarf, and would be discarding his hat once he dismounted.

He found Dan in the clearing in front of the cabin, tending to the fire. Calling a greeting, Mart stowed Strawberry in the paddock by the barn, and then walked over to the camp fire, butterflies in his stomach. The firelight complemented Dan’s handsome visage with a golden glow, an almost Gaussian blur, and the flickering of the flames across his ivory skin gave the impression light was at war with shadow to possess his fine features.

"She walks in beauty, like the night, of cloudless climes and starry skies, and all that’s best of dark and bright,” Mart recited, sitting down beside Dan on one of the split logs.

“Lord Byron. How nice.” Dan quirked an eyebrow. “Do I remind you of a coveted female cousin of yours, as per the poem’s origin, or were you just thinking of a Romantic piece for a romantic holiday?”

“I actually think you’re more like a Byronic hero than anything else,” Mart admitted. “I really do admire the man’s work, what with the interesting archetypes he created.”

Dan passed him a plain white envelope. “With any luck, here’s a work you’ll like just as much.”

Opening the envelope, Mart gasped. “Tickets to  _ Crisis on Infinite Earths _ !”

Dan grinned. “I got them for the night it opens at the Cameo.”

“This is fantastic!” Mart enthused. “Want to get balcony seats when we go?”

The firelight flared in Dan’s icy eyes. “You know I do.”

“And this assemblage,” Mart handed the rucksack over to Dan, “is for you. The backpack is for when it gets warmer and we resume our campouts in the wilderness.”

“Always thinking ahead, aren’t you?” Dan accepted the gift, smiling at Mart. God, his smile could fuel a Starfleet ship from the Delta quadrant all the way back to headquarters.

“I couldn’t figure out just one item to buy for you,” Mart confessed. “So I decided to buy you a bunch of your favorite things, like coffee, tea, and incense. Also, I made some sort of dessert that basically combines Reese’s Cups with graham crackers.”

“I’m always impressed by you Beldens and your culinary talents,” Dan told him fondly.

“It’s not talent-- it’s an acquired skill.” Mart chuckled. “You can be damn sure Helen Belden didn’t raise any of her children to be helpless in the kitchen.”

“Thank you, Mart,” Dan said with a soft smile. “You’re very thoughtful.”

Gathering his nerves, Mart decided to raise his concerns. “Are you okay with doing this-- this couple thing?”

“If I wasn’t, I wouldn’t have kissed you at Christmas or invited you here tonight,” Dan replied honestly. 

“I just-- it’s not that-- I don’t want you to think you have to date me in order for us to still be friends,” Mart managed.

“I don’t,” Dan reassured him. “We both know I’ve pushed you away before when you’ve offered. You respected my decision. And I was the one to make a move this time. I’m the one who wanted us to start dating, remember?”

“Are we dating?” Mart’s question was genuine. “Don’t get me wrong, Dan. I want to date you, but we’ve never really said what our status is.”

“I want to be with you. I want us to be dating,” Dan affirmed. He grew quiet, and for a moment Mart wasn’t certain if he would continue. “I wasn’t ready before, but I am now.”

“I’m glad,” Mart said affectionately, grasping one of Dan’s hands.

Responding to the touch, Dan clasped Mart’s hand in both of his and turned to face him directly. “I’m going to be truthful with you, Mart. I’ve got baggage. I’ve got issues. For a long time, I didn’t want to be with you or anyone else because I just felt incomplete . . . broken.”

“You’re not,” Mart said determinedly.

Dan ducked his head briefly. “I guess that really depends on your point of view. But you know I have a past, and you want me anyway. You want me, not just my best, not just my highlights--  _ me _ , and everything about me. That’s significant. I can’t define what it means to me, to be actually be wanted. I can’t quantify it. But  I’ve been confused, I guess, for a long time, about what I’m supposed to feel in comparison to what I actually feel.”

“What do you feel?” Mart asked quietly.

“Anger,” Dan stated flatly. “Ever since my mother died and I was shoved into foster care, I’ve been furious. Even more so after I got the letter declaring my father dead. It wasn’t apparent, most of the time, but I used to feel anger every moment of the day, lurking just beneath my skin. My anger drove me, motivated me, and I honestly don’t know where I’d be without it. And I was afraid all the time, about what would happened to me, what people might do to me if I didn’t have my guard up twenty-four seven.”

“But not anymore?” Mart questioned. 

“Not as much,” Dan answered. “It’s diminished, I suppose. Don’t get me wrong, I still have problems with trusting people-- I think that might be why I don’t sleep most nights. But I’m just becoming calmer. I’ve realized I don’t have to be in absolute control every minute of the day.”

With his free hand, Mart reached up to brush his palm across Dan’s smooth cheek. “I’m not lying, Dan, when I say I’m not here to tear down your walls. I just want to show you it’s okay to lower them every once in a while. I want to be someone you grow to trust, not someone who forces you to.”

“I know that,” Dan returned. “And I’ll tell you, Mart, it means a lot to me that you want me, that you’re willing to be patient with me. You’re one of the few.”

“What do you mean?” Mart asked.

“My uncle took me in out of an obligation to blood. Elijah Maypenny took me in as a favor to a friend. The Bob-Whites took me in as a thanks for saving Bobby and helping Trixie.” Dan let out a long breath. “But you? You weren’t obligated to be my friend, but you committed yourself fully and devotedly.”

“You know, that’s the thing,” Mart said thoughtfully. “I really can’t explain it, but I’m drawn to you. I look forward to any time we can spend together. I can’t wait to talk to you about the books we read, or the movies we see. The way you think, speak, and opine-- it all just mesmerizes me. You’re intelligent. You see so many more angles, so many more facets, than I do, and you call attention to them in a quiet but convincing way. You have me considering topics I’d never thought of, and reconsidering opinions I thought were set in stone. I just feel like you’re the best I’ll ever encounter, and that I’m at my best when I’m with you.”

“You love me for my intellect?” Dan raised an eyebrow, amused.

“I love you,” Mart said, surprised by how easily but firmly the words rolled off of his tongue. “I love you because you always have something worthwhile to say. I love you because of the way I can speak to you as myself and I know you recognize me as an individual, not as just another member of the Belden clan. And I love you because you listen to me, truly listen, when I talk. Even if it’s something ultimately trivial, like who my favorite  _ Star Wars _ writer is, or why I’m on Captain America’s side for the Civil War comic storyline. You listen to me, consider me, and recall what I say so you can return to it later. You value me, and I know it. I value you, too.”

“While we’re on that subject, I also have this for you.” Dan presented Mart with a small, flat white box, not unlike the one he himself gave Diana earlier in the day. 

“But Dan! This is so sudden!” Mart joked, and Dan rolled his eyes but grinned.

Opening the box, Mart found a pendant of a silver star set with a gleaming white stone. “The Evenstar,” he said, raising his eyes to meet Dan’s.

“I remembered what you said about thinking the introduction of the Evenstar was a pragmatic change to the movies from  _ The Lord of the Rings _ books,” Dan explained. “To be honest, I wanted to get you an Elfstone replica, you know, from the books, but those are hard to come by.”

Mart chuckled. “You didn’t want to weave me a flag?”

Dan smirked. “My loom is in the shop, waiting on repairs. I’ll let you know when it’s fixed.”

Snorting, Mart shook his head. “Come on, Dan! If Arwen could weave a flag in a pre-industrial society, you can make one today with no problem!” Then he grew serious. “Arwen gave those items to Aragorn as a symbol of her love.”

“That’s why I’m giving it to you, Mart,” Dan told him gently. “I love you. Now, I may not be good at showing it. I’ll be the first person to admit I’m damaged. But I feel safe when I’m with you. I don’t feel ecstatic, buzzed, or intoxicated, or anything of those things. I just . . . feel like I’m at peace, along with a sense of relief that I’ve found the right person. And I say ‘right’ because I believe it.”

“What makes you so sure?” Mart asked, intrigued.

“Within a month of meeting me, you stopped cramming as many SAT vocab words into a sentence when we talk. For whatever reason, I brought you to put down some of your defenses. I don’t think mine will fall as readily, but for you, I’ll give it a try.” Dan held Mart’s gaze.

Mart watched him carefully. “Dan . . . you keep saying you’re wounded and damaged. I don’t mean to pry, but what happened to you?”

Dan sighed. “It’s not a matter of ‘what,’ Mart, as much as it’s just a question of ‘when.’”

“The Glen Road Inn.” The words flew out of Mart’s mouth in an instant. “What went on last summer?”

Sadness glinted in Dan’s eyes as an expression Mart couldn’t quite read, either due to the dim lighting or otherwise, flitted over his features. “I’ll tell you one day, Mart. But not tonight.”

“Sooner rather than later?” Mart queried.

“One day,” Dan repeated quietly. He pressed the Evenstar into Mart’s hand, and used his own to close Mart’s fingers around it. “Right now, I just want to be happy with you.”

“In that case, happy Valentine’s Day, Daniel.” Mart reached out and drew Dan closer.

“Ditto, Martin,” Dan said with another smirk, and drew Mart in for a long kiss.

The darkness of night surrounded them. Soft wind rustled the bare branches of the trees. Not far off in the distance, an owl called, and further away, a fox barked. The fire popped and crackled, as the flames danced and smoke coiled upward toward the stars.

Mart, his eyes closed, concentrated on sealing the time in his memory forever, wanting to remember every part of his evening in the forest with Dan. His only regret was that he couldn’t live the rest of his life in this moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Explanations:**
> 
> The St. Valentine’s Day Massacre was an event revolving around Mafia warfare during the United States’s Prohibition Era. It was not about the martyrdom of the Catholic saint, as Mart assumes it was.
> 
> Dr. Who is a British television franchise that has expanded to include novels and merchandise. It’s easy to know who the fans are, as they will be happy to unsolicitedly engage you about their opinions regarding the show, its installments, and their shipping preferences. You’ve also probably seen the show’s merchandise somewhere.
> 
> Weeping Angels are a group of supernatural creatures from the Dr. Who franchise. They are one of the series’s most popular and frightening group of monsters.
> 
> When Mr. Belden refers to Dan “preserving [the Belden] family,” he is referencing The Black Jacket Mystery, where Dan rescued Bobby and The Mystery of the Blinking Eye, where Dan helped the police locate Trixie when she was speaking with the mobsters. The events of “last summer” refer to The Mystery of the Uninvited Guest.
> 
> Dan being an insomniac is an invention of my own. It’s also discussed in several of my other pieces, chiefly “Genetics” and “So Maybe I’m a Masochist.”
> 
> Similar to the above, I have also given Dan light blue eyes, when he had dark eyes in canon. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> Star Trek is an American television franchise that has expanded to include novels and merchandise. The program helped familiarize widespread modern audiences with the science fiction genre. The Original Series and The Next Generation are the best eras.
> 
> Kurt Vonnegut was an American science fiction and satire author, frequently writing stories revolving around the question of free will and one’s ultimate purpose in life. His most famous novel is Slaughterhouse Five, which has been frequently banned from schools and communities on the basis that it is anti-American and anti-Christian.
> 
> Star Wars is an American film franchise that has expanded throughout the years to include novels and merchandise. But you probably already know that.
> 
> Lord Byron was an English poet who was a major contributor to the Romantic literary movement of the late 18th and early 19th century. The center of several scandals and is rumored to have fathered a child with his half-sister, he is not nearly the heroic rogue Mart considers him to be. Also, Lord Byron did. in fact. write the poem “She Walks in Beauty” about Anne Hathaway, his cousin by marriage.
> 
> Crisis on Infinite Earths was a DC Comics Crisis Crossover storyline. There is not an actual theatrical movie in real life, though there could be one day. There was a direct-to-video movie in 2010 called Crisis on Two Earths with similar themes that also contained interesting commentary and viewpoints regarding nihilistic concepts.
> 
> Marvel Civil War was a Marvel Comics storyline where Iron Man wanted to oppress metahumans, and Captain America wanted metahumans to be free. It’s currently a movie, and while I hope it did the characters justice, I have little faith.
> 
> Arwen and Aragorn are characters from JRR Tolkein’s The Lord of the Rings trilogy. Their love story can be found in the appendixes of the final book. There is also a film trilogy of the same name that was directed by Peter Jackson.
> 
>  
> 
> **Written for[Jixemitri Valentine CWP](http://jixemitri.net/circle/projects/2cwp4.html) to contain the following elements:**
> 
> \- A Valentine from a crush: the Valentine exchanges between Mart and Diana, and Dan and Jane.
> 
> \- A kid's Valentine craft project: Bobby’s shoebox Valentine mailbox.
> 
> \- The St. Valentine's Day Massacre: it’s the topic of a book Mart sees at the mall bookstore.
> 
> \- Candy box deceptively full of something really healthy (heart-shaped if you want!): the Valentine of heart-shaped strawberries Jane gives to Dan
> 
> \- Someone who feels like a third, fifth, or seventh wheel: the girl Mart overhears at the mall bookstore.
> 
> \- A naughty picture (painting, ad, photo, drawing): the Victoria’s Secret advertisement Mart sees at the mall.
> 
> \- Finding a sweet memento from someone's past: the wedding album and the piece of nylon Mart finds.
> 
> \- The balcony of the Cameo: where Mart and Dan plan to watch Crisis on Infinite Earths.
> 
> \- Annoying, overplayed jewelry commercials: the loudspeaker commercials Mart hears at the mall.
> 
> \- The book Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus: Mart sees it on display at the mall bookstore.
> 
> \- Carryover item from Project 2.1, a new recipe: the peanut butter chocolate bars Mart makes for Dan’s Valentine’s Day gift.


End file.
